Nails red till rights are recognized

Tonight I was doing a lot of thinking about the rights for gays in America and the trial of making marriage or whatever the term will be  into effect. I decided that I don’t wanna be a bystander anymore. So in my own way I did my part. I painted my nails red in own sunshine way. I also made a video asking people to support human rights because that’s what’s fair. I’m making a fashion protest stand by painting and maintaining my nails till the law is passed and decrees that all can be happily “whatever”.  So please watch the video and PAINT YO NAILS!





Nails red until rights are recognized

Nails red until rights are recognized


Over the past few months as I have been performing and really getting to know my own steps in life  and meeting other entertainers and famous people I have started questioning why people want to be famous? There are so many different reasons why people could be famous but it all seems to come back to money and popularity. I would love to be rich and I am not going to lie, I would think it would be amazing to be known on a global and universal scale. I have been asking myself how I am going to be famous. I can always seem to tell myself that I will one day be famous but never have really known how it was or is going to come about. And I have realized that I most likely will be famous for body image and self acceptance of one’s self.

I might not contribute any monetary value to the world but if I could give one person the hope and faith they need to become successful in their lives then I feel like I have accomplished my goals. Body image seems to be an epidemic in the world with everyone telling us what we should be and what we shouldn’t be. The way I look at is that we should be who we are long as we are happy. It doesn’t matter if you are obese or anorexic skinny. As long as you can look at yourself in the mirror and realize what an amazing person you are, that is all that matters.

Granted I might not have the best or worst body in the world. I do however Love myself unconditionally no matter what my body is doing or what phase of life I am going through. I haven’t always loved myself or my body. Half my life I wish I could just take a hot knife and cut off my fat like butter. It has taken me a long time to realize that I am amazing person and that I have a lot to offer in this world. And that is my goal….i want other people to see what amazing creatures they are.

What are your thought on body image and society???

BEARlesque…A journey to remember

I know it has been a while since I have last posted much about The Boys Of BEARlesque, but what an adventure it has been thus far! We have done incredible things. We have performed at the Roseland Ballroom for the Mr. Black Expo, Polyamorous Pride, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and other random events.

For me it has been a personal journey as well as a bonding journey with the other fellow cast members. For myself, I have become a much stronger person and more confident than I ever thought I would be. I have discovered a side of me through burlesque that I never thought possible. I never thought I would be able to look at my naked body in the mirror and be able to say “Wow, I like what I see”. I always thought that I would be looking at my body for the rest of my life thinking “why haven’t I gone to the gym? Why did I eat that for dinner? Why this and why that?”. Today I see myself  in the mirror and I know I am not what society deems to be “pretty”, but the saying ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ truly rings true. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what you look like, how fat or skinny you are, short or tall, black or white, human or martian you are…what really matters is the inner you, your soul, your essence. Honestly, when I am going through my day in my memory, I don’t recall people mostly by what they look like but mostly by the essence of them. Being part of BEARlesque has given me the confidence to see that I am a beautiful uniquely carved human being just like everyone else, and that we should be celebrated everything single days of our lives. That every breath we take should be an awesome experience, and that being able to live and have freedom of our own thoughts, even if they are never voiced is an amazing gorgeous experience that no one can ever take away from us.

What I have liked so much about being part of this group is seeing people’s reactions when us big boys take the stage and have the confidence to shake what we’ve got and be able to move just as well as skinny people. I also like the fact that I know somewhere out there even if it is just one person at a time, I am giving them the confidence to just “hi” to themselves.

Yes our shows are crazy, boundary pushing, drag queen-esque, risqué, and sometimes just downright crazy, BUT that’s the point. If you see the same things everyday and never question why things are the way they are then you become desensitized. When you put shock value into people’s lives, they realize that they are still alive, and even for just a moment they capture that spark of a dream, the essence of excitement, and possibly one day the courage to say ” hey this is who I am, and i like what I see!”

Stalking…Big Brother…Or Not?

The past few months I have had “Big Brother” on my mind a lot lately. “1984” never left my brain. So I have been watching people, like a lot of people do and looking and checking out all the hot men. I started wondering, “what constitutes stalking?” So on the train I have started noticing that people stay stuck in their own little worlds unless they are with friends. Istarted taking pictures of random hot men, wondering “is this stalking”, or is this a form of “Big Brother?”.

For those who don’t know what Big Brother is, it’s not the T.V. show. Big Brother is a term that comes from the book “1984” by George Orswell. The book is about how the government a.k.a. Big Brother is constantly knowing what we are doing at all times in our lives, even our private lives, and they go to banishing all indiviuality. This book has stuck with me since high school since I am definitely not a sheep. And since everyone nowadays has electronics of some sort, we are messengers for Big Brother even if we don’t know it.

Therefore I raise the question, is snapping pictures of random hot men a form a Big Brother? Or is it an innoncent act, or is it stalking?

Sunshine Makes Guacamole

So last night I decided that I wanted to make guacamole. Therefore I did but with a twist. I am creating a new series that will be on youtube for the time being called “Sunshine Land”. It will be about me doing outrageous things in my most extravagent Sunshine characters. Here is a link to my first video! hope you enjoy!

Gender-Bending Bear

Definition of Bear from

“Bears tend to have hairy bodies and facial hair; some are heavy-set; some project an image of working-class masculinity in their grooming and appearance, though none of these are requirements or unique indicators. Some bears place importance on presenting a hypermasculineimage and may shun interaction with, and even disdain, men who exhibit effeminacy.[1] The bear concept can function as an identity, an affiliation, and an ideal to live up to, and there is ongoing debate in bear communities about what constitutes a bear, however a consensus exists that inclusion is an important part of the Bear Community.”

Definition of a Gender-Bender from

Gender bender is an informal term used to refer to a person who actively transgresses, or “bends,” expected gender rolesBoy George is called a “gender bender” because of his tendency to wear make-up and clothes perceived as feminine. Gender bending is sometimes a form of social activism undertaken in response to assumptions or over-generalisations about genders. Some gender bendersidentify with the gender assigned them at birth, but challenge the norms of that gender throughandrogynous behavior and atypical gender roles. Gender benders may self-identify as transgender orgenderqueer, feeling that the gender assigned to them at their birth is an inaccurate or incomplete description of themselves; some are transsexual and desire to change their physical sex throughhormone therapy or sex reassignment surgery, while others were born intersexual. Others may identify as Two-Spirit or members of a third gender.”

Lately a lot of great things have been happening in my life and it has made me really think about life, who I am, and the constraints or rather molds of society. Ever since I started doing BEARLESQUE I have discovered a side of me that I have never really let myself embrace before. Be it the wigs, the heels, or the dresses but I really do like dressing up and showing people that there is more than one way of expressing yourself and exploring life than just through the molds that society has set up for us. For example, I love wearing heels  and platforms whenever I can get the chance to. Not only do they make me feel sexy and super tall(because you know 6’4″ isn’t tall enough!) but I like seeing the reactions from people. Don’t get me wrong I get mixed reactions but surprisingly mostly positive. I like to see how people react to a big man like me rocking out in heels and such. A lot of people are surprised and think it’s awesome that I am myself and I don’t hide who I am.

Gender-Bending according to is someone who mixes genders from the hyper masculine to the hyper feminine. I am not saying that I want to be a woman. I am a man and I love being a man. What I am saying though is it is awesome to blend the roles of the genders and the fashion of both. Although I am a masculine man I can rock out heels and platforms shoes way better than most females. I know this because in NYC it is so easy to watch people and I am heel whore…I love them!!! So when I see a woman in hot heels or just heels in general and she can’t seem to walk in them, it makes me question: Can’t I help teach you how to walk properly in heels? And why are you trying to rock them out if you don’t know how to?

SO through everything I have learned that I love blending the sexes and genders to the point that people can’t tell if I am masculine being feminine or feminine being masculine. And I comfortable doing both because I am perfectly comfortable in my skin because I love who I am.

That brings me to my question thought of the day…
Why is it so hard for people to love who they are embrace everything about themselves? Remember life is too short to not live in the moment. No point in dwelling in the past, but important to remember it’s lessons. NO point in worrying about the future because it’s going to be here whether we are ready or not. SO live in the moment, the present, and give life all you have right here and now! So go on my shine sprites and shine bright!!!